Marshall's Blog

It occurs to me that one of my consistent mental exercises is the one where I try to take all the current changes in my life and extrapolate future events. I should say possible future events. This is a close cousin to rehearsing a conversation you are going to have repeatedly before the actual person you plan on talking to is involved. It is kind of like emotional planning. If I can think of all the worst possibilities then I can lessen the sting of surprise, I can better “handle” disappointment if I can expect it fist. I had a student once that was worried about visiting their parents. They spoke about the past of their relationship and just vented about how it all made them feel. While writing this I remember what I told her and am slightly embarrassed because I so often fail to keep my own counsel or heed my own advice. I told her to feel her feelings to pick them up and then put them down and to leave space for her parents to surprise her. Maybe it will all happen as you expec...

       Small eyes see more than we are often comfortable with. Especially when it comes to our own faults, internal logical inconsistencies, and insecurities. They learn slowly the truths they are permitted to speak and the ones that are not socially acceptable. They are not to tell the truths that hurt feelings. While many times this advice is warranted to learn how to be kind rather than cruel, the problem is our children will come across fragile people. Fragile people have many true statements that act like landmines ready for anyone intrepid enough to try and get to know them. The landmines are the times they are triggered, lash out, and attempt by inappropriate means to protect their fragile ego. We cannot avoid these people exactly and as such our children will not be able to either. They will meet them as their teachers, their friends, and their bosses. For folks that are typically non-confrontational we favor a filter that tries to avoid these unpleasant si...

            I am 18 years old, just graduated high school and I am in my hometown of Big Spring, Texas or as many locals affectionately and bitterly call it “the whirlpool.” Why you ask? Because no matter how far you get it sucks you back in. That desperate feeling that young people often feel in small towns is very real. It seems like you will never break out into the big world and when you do it’s only a matter of time before you get sucked back in. In example of this, I had a college friend that made it all the way to New York, NY and after a few years of working and striving settled back home. You can only really understand the feeling if you have had it. During this summer I had a serious decision to make. I could launch my adulthood and move to a college town somewhere(anywhere) and take the risk of being sucked back home with less options than I started with or cope with the feelings and get two years of free college. In retrospect, such an ea...